You/ Lisa Leanard (Mom)
I am sitting here remembering the night before you were born and missing you so very much. I don't understand why you had to go, but please remember, I loved you then and I love you now. While I will never understand, I will always remember. Close
Missing you always / Lisa Leanard (Mom)
It is Christmas again and it is not the same without you. We all love and miss you. I think of you often and remember your beautiful smile and how you always made people laugh. I love you my son. Close
Hey brother / Sergio Vasquez (close friend/ military buddy )
Hey brother how are up there? Just wanted to say I haven't forgotten about you and that you go with me everywhere I ride. That's right I finally got a bike a year ago and joined the SCRC Chapter in Fort Worth. I hope your are proud of me and keep an eye on me from time to time. Still miss you bother and I always dedicate whatever rides I go on to you.
Missing you terribly everyday / Tasya
So many things have changed. You are always constant though despite how my world is so empty without you. I try my best as I remember our conversation that night in September. All of the things you wanted for us and me if one day something might happen you said. I thought you were crazy to talk like that. Nothing happens to people our age I thought. There's no going back and no going forward it seems. I am sorry I can not seem to do and be all of the things you would have done had it been me and not you. I am angry and hurt, but not at you. I try to hold on to all that brings me closer to you, but it doesn't work-it isn't you no matter how it seems to be the next best thing to you. I am sorry we didn't get married sooner, perhaps that would have made a difference to everyone else, except for you and I. I love you. Close
This past week has been a walk down memory lane. Back in Tyler, the town where you were born. Back in Aunt Sue's house, where you spent so much time. She was your "Grandmother", always there for you. She cared for you and me so very much and I know you missed her as much as I do. Clara loved you too, and know she is with you and Aunt Sue and now I miss all of you. Losing her now leave such an empty place. We all love you.
Just wanted to say hello and let you know we are okay. The world is not the same without you. The laughter is missing. Your smiling face and just you. I miss you and thing of you every day. Know that I love you dearly and remember. Love, Mom
Your Dad's 60th birthday / Lisa Leanard (Mom)Read >>
Your Dad's 60th birthday / Lisa Leanard (Mom)
Hello, Anthony, Your dad will be 60 on saturday. It would be so good for you to be here. I miss you so much. You always were there for these family days. Always found a way to get leave and come home, even if it was only for a day. I wish we could have had just one more visit before you left us. I missed you when you left for the Navy and I missed you every time we got together and then parted. Now I just miss you all the time, the laughter, the talks, and just having you near, even if it was just for a few hours. I wish you peace. I love you. If you can be around this saturday in spirit I look forward to it. Again, I love you Anthony. Close
Your lover / Tasya
You never said 'I'm leaving' You never said 'good bye' You were gone before I knew it and only God knows why. A million times I have needed you A million times I've cried If love alone could have saved you You never would of died In life you were loved so dearly In death you are loved still In my heart you hold a special place That no one can fill It broke my heart to lose you But you did not go alone For a part of me went with you
I miss you so much. Your Dad's birthday is this weekend and it doesn't feel right that you are not here. You should be here. I wish so much to hear your voice-so full of life and so funny. How you made me smile without reason all the time and how no one but you could ever do that. Life without you is unbearable and unfair. I wish had the answers, but all I have left is a memory and a dream-neither of which I can get close enough to touch. Close
What I miss this morning / Tasya
I miss going to bed next to you every night laying on your chest, cuddling up to you in the middle of the night when I woke up. Rolling over in the morning to see you smiling back at me. Kissing you when you left for work, in the middle of the day, in the kitchen. How you yelled at me to get going because we were going to be late. The phone calls at work to say hi and see how my day was going. Doing your laundry and buying you gifts when I saw something you would like. The way you looked at me when you thought I looked hot. How we could talk for hours. The look on your face when we talked about our kids, even though we didn't have any yet. How I knew you were meant just for me, and how happy I was that I finally found you. How you would rather spend time with me than your friends, and never let me down or made me doubt for one second that you loved me completely and would forver. How you loved to teach me new things and always believed in me. How strong I felt knowing that you thought I could do anything; and how I knew that you knew I would always be there to make sure you succeeded in everything you wanted. I miss making plans with you for the morning, the day, the weekend, and the rest of our life. Close
After reading this, and thinking about Tony, it seems like just yesterday that I was sitting with him talking about the Charger, and measuring the side pipes for the truck, because Kyle helped him measure the first time, and they were too short.... Tony though that was funny that Kyle got drunk and couldn't measure the things right, and just said....." I guess that I will just send these back and get the right ones now. I really feel for all of the members of the family and Tasya.
As I read through all of this, I thought about him more than I have in a very long while, and then I cried and then I laughed. I laughed thinking about him and Kyle getting drunk at the bar, and then always insisting on dragging me on stage with them to sing the darkness..... and about how hard he laughed when Tasya came home drunk and I was drunk on the couch and she hit me in the face with her shoes when she tried to throw them down on the couch. I now that everyone has great memories of tony like this, and I am always going to remember him for those things......
Your 27th Birthday / Lisa (Mom)
Dearest Anthony, The passing of time doesn't lessen the sorrow of not having you here. I tried to spend your birthday the way you would have wanted. I felt you all around that day. It was the first sunny day in a long time and Tasya, Barb & I went and had Sushi, your favorite. We all miss you and your Dad made a toast to you at Rascal's with many of your friends around. You are with me always. Love, Mom Close
Your brothers Birthday / Mom (Mom)
Hello Anthony, Today is Kris' birthday, he's 24. Kris misses you alot. He's back in school and still doing his training stuff. Today is dreary and gray and I just wish I could call and talk to you. I love you. Mom Close
Another Sunny Day without you / Mom (Mom)
Dear Anthony, Today is the kind of day you would love. Cool, clear and sunny. These kind of days remind me of you and how much I miss you. You would be out doing the things you love. Uncle John (yaber) told me he started on your Charger. He got the steering column in and is going to replace the tires. He hopes to have it road worthy buy the end of March. Your cousin Erica is getting married that last weekend and he wants everyone to see it when they come for the wedding. I am trying hard to go forward but some days I just can't do it. Today is one of those days. I love you Anthony and hold you in my heart always. Love, Mom Close
Missing you / Tasya
This sucks. Our last Xmas we spent in Destin,FL-it rained. I'm in NC-it's raining...the whole week. It's not our house, not the same. Never will be. Can't buy you a present, because you' re not here to open it. Everyone misses you. I love you so much, it kills me, the thoughts kill me. I am sorry. I am not as strong as you thought, I feel cheated and I am angry. I hope you believe in something else, and I think you do, casue I want a second chance. If I thought for one second you didn't, I don't think I would still be here. I hope your not mad at me, it's just so damn lonely without you. Close
My Thanks for You / Teresa (Mom-in-law)
Dearest Anthony, I want to express my thanks for you coming into Tasya's life. You were a bright and shining light that showed in her eyes from the moment she spoke of you. "Moms are Important" - that was the reason you had to come meet me in Florida. Seeing you for the first time was such a treat...a smile as big as Texas came across your face as you took me in that great bear hug of yours and planted a big kiss! That's from me, you said!!! I felt like I had known you forever instead of just a few moments. I felt like you were my son from that moment, I felt blessed not only for myself, but also for my daughter. And the RING...what can I say, you came into the kitchen (isn't that where all events happen) and asked for some one on one time with me. You asked for Tasya's hand and said you're the first, I had to ask you first if I could marry your daughter. Then after a few loving words, you brought out the little box with the big ring. What you didn't know is that I said yes because of the love that was bursting out of you and Tasya, not because of the ring. It could have been a paper ring and I wouldn't have felt any differant as a parent, as a Mom. I had to be with Tasya this week, this one year after you left us so suddenly. No one can make it easier for Tasya but a Mom never stops trying. I love you like my son Anthony and miss you. Please continue to be that light in Tasya. We are all blessed to have Anthony touch us and leave a loving impression. P.S. I wish I would have gone on that ride with you Love, Teresa / Mom Close
Today/ Lisa (Mom)
Dear Anthony, It has been a year without you and it has been a difficult journey. A day doesn't go by that doesn't bring back a memory or bring tears to my eyes. How can you be gone? Why? It has taken me a year to even say these thing and even now it hurts so bad. I am trying to do what I think you would want but it seems so unimportant. Nothing has the meaning it once had, holidays aren't the same, life is not the same. You had your whole life ahead of you and your plans were for so much happiness and growth. Things that you always wanted were finally happening. What am I supposed to do? I still can't answer that question. Your Dad & Kris miss you so much and although I am trying, I can't really do much. Most of the time I just sit, sometimes thinking of you, sometimes just sitting. I hope you are able to look in on us once and a while and know that we love you and miss you. Tasya is trying hard and has been a great help to me, her memories of you over the past 3 years helps me know you and believe you were happy. We have become even better friends and I know that is what you would have wanted. Kris doesn't talk much but he misses you. He just finished 2 college classes and did well, you would be proud of him. Look in on Dad once in a while, he really misses you and you know Dad, he doesn't say much, just keeps it inside. None of us will ever be the same without you. There is a big empty space in my heart and in my life. I will never understand any of this but know that I love you dearly and you are in my thoughts and prayers every day, always. I love you Anthony and I will do my best to take care of everyone & everything you held dear. Mom Close
im sorry / Connie (aunt 2 sammy pepe )
to Angel Anthony and his family - I came upon this website as my nephew also has a website dedicated to him. His name is sammy pepe and he passed on June 21, 2003. My nephew chose to end his own life. My nephew was the love of my life next 2 my 2 children. He was also my godson, we shared everything except for the 1 thing we didn't share, he did not tell me he was depressed
No matter what the circumstance the loss of any child is always unbearable. I know because I see the pain in my sisters eyes everyday. Your son/boyfriend has a gentle kind spirit - I see it in his photos and in his tributes.
I miss you / Tasya
I am drowning in sadness sitting here. How painful it is not to hear you laugh everyday, to see you smile when I come home, or when I opened the garage door to find you working on your truck, or to lay on your arms at night when we talked about out plans. I would literally give everything to just sit and talk to you. Who would have thought this would have been the way things turned out for us. So not fair and so unbelievable. I don't know what to do. I called your cell phone and our house phone. They were both disconnected. I don't know why I did not know that. I guess I just keep looking for you. Promise me you won't let me get lost. I am trying to do what you would want me to. It's just that without you, nothing has any purpose. I never knew how empty my life was until I met you, I couldn't stand to be away from you for one day. Every day hurts like when I had to say good bye and you would ride back to Corpus. Y ou covered my pillow in your police t-shirt and sprayed it down with your cologne so I would not forget you. Remember when we used to fight over who loved the other more? I always loved that about you. Good night Anthony. Close
You're missed / The Sagers (friends)
It's been a long year. We all miss you very much. We think of you often and of all the fun times. The fact that you aren't here leaves a hole in our hearts. Every July 3rd we will surely look back and smile, (and know there won't be fireworks), and every July 4th we'll remember the last time we saw you. You were a good friend to us all, Shelby still talks about you. Just wanted to say that we love you and miss you. Close
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